Ah, Stuff

The moon is so bright tonight. Wish I could sit by a lake in a forest clearing and play music to the moonlight. That would be nice. Instead? I'm at home, sitting in front of my computer as usual, pondering the meaning of my existence. You know, when you reach that state and you feel as if you have everything you've ever needed or wanted in life... what else is there to wish for?

Is it against the rules to wish for a wishing well?

I am literally agitated over NOTHING. It's like I've gotten so used to complaining about everything that I am now complaining for the sake of complaining, when there is really nothing to complain about. I've sorted out everything in the end, and I figured that I don't actually care about most of the stuff going on in my life. Why is it that we feel dissatisfied when the future is so bright?

I have a house. I have a computer with internet access. I have FRIENDS. I have an education, I have a high ATAR, I'm going to a university.Sure there are things I don't have, but those things are trivial anyway. I hate feeling unhappy but not actually knowing what I'm unhappy about. There's something wrong with me.

I want a beach trip. Or just a tour around the countryside. The atmosphere around here is suffocating. I look up at the blue sky, decorated by puffy clouds and a ring of green leaves from surrounding trees--- and I wonder, how can I NOT be happy?

Ah, it doesn't matter.