Old Friend

Totally ignoring my mother's wish for me to keep all interaction with people outside the family to a minimum, I caught up with a friend who I haven't talked to in a long time. We updated each other on our lives, and after I had finished bitching to him about everyone and everything, his turn came.

"Women are so complicated," he started.
"What makes you say that?"
"Because they just have these random mood swings outta nowhere, and people say PMS but PMS does not occur everyday. I just don't understand."
"Maybe you're just retarded," I offered unhelpfully. Typical response from me.
"As if you're any better than I am."
"Sure I am. Do you know the 3 words a girl wants to hear the most?"
"No."
"Take a guess."
"I love you."
"Awww, I love you too."
"-_-"
"The correct answer is: you lost weight."


Then we joked about how people like me are entirely responsible for the growing problem of girls with eating disorders and poor self-image. I suppose that's true- given my perfect beautiful body, I'm sure it's not just the girls who are jealous. What, I'm twisting his words? What else could he possibly mean?

This world would be boring without me.

The rest of our conversation led nowhere, as I refused to cooperate and made bad jokes at every turn. He forgave me.

...I guess even when life is miserable, there's always something (or rather, someone) who can make you smile.