Lamb

I've been slowly not-eating meat for the longest time, because I still haven't given up the idea of eating enough plants so that I become a plant myself. Anyway today I got home from tutorial and I was really hungry, so I decided it would be like, the greatest of ideas to make a hot pot with lamb, fish fillets, fish tofu and whatever the fuck else is in here. Idk. It tasted pretty good though, when I started.

I was like, "oh my God this meat is delicious" (yeah "that's what she said", I know, fuck you too). After about 3 bites of pure deliciousness, I didn't want to eat any more. Except I put a fuckload of lamb in there, so I felt like I should keep eating. And I ate, and ate, and ate. I ate very slowly, because I didn't actually want to eat anything any more after my 3rd bite of lamb, and it just became less appetizing as the temperature of my food went from hot to very warm to warm to cool to this tastes fucking disgusting.

I still have my left over food in front of me, and I'd throw it out except I feel really bad. Except it's not like I'd want to eat it in like, the next month, so I don't see why I'd bother storing it, either. Chances are I will end up chucking it out, and not eat meat for ages.

I don't think I remember the appeal of meat any more. All I can smell is the oil and the--- I don't even know what it is I'm smelling, but it's gross. Fish seems to be the only tolerable thing right now--- fish, fish and more fish. Yay mercury poisoning.

Why is it that even my food is conspiring against me...