Indecisions

I'm at that point again where I no longer know what I want to do. I mean, there's the whole school thing, but that doesn't start until March, and until then I have to suffer the terrible company at "home". I'm pretty much working 6 hours a day 5 days a week, and it's getting to that point where I feel super-tired. I'd actually like to have my own time when I have my 2 days off, but the people at "home" seem to want to dictate very minute of my life. Putting up with them is an absolute chore.

So I was on ebay, trying to spend money, buy stuff and consequently feel better. I got to that point where I realized there was nothing I really wanted. Well that's not technically true, since I really want a house, but I'm not going to be able to afford one working as a casual in retail over Christmas. I thought I'd buy some games, but I figure I wouldn't really have time to play them, and I have plenty of unfinished games as it is. I have more than enough books already, and right now I figure buying more wouldn't be a smart idea. Clothing is always an option, but I feel kinda uncomfortable with the idea of buying clothes online, since I have no idea whether it'd fit me despite reading the size in the description. That, and my closet is already full... full with clothes I don't like wearing that other people have bought for me...

Even though I have money now, I don't feel like there's much to spend it on. I'd love to buy a house, but I make like $1000 a month so it'll only take me a thousand months to make enough money to buy a house. That's like... a little less than 100 years, yeah? I don't think I'll live that long. I'm spending my money on sushi atm, because there's nothing else I'd rather eat when I'm on break. It's not like I HAVE to spend money, it's just that I spend so much time working, and the only thing I get out of working is money... except that money's just going straight to the bank and I kinda feel like I've done nothing.

I finally got yelled at by my boss at work today (I don't actually work with my boss so this is all over the phone)- something about not knowing where stock was. It was kind of bullshit that she picked on me for not knowing, because the stock I didn't know was this stupid novelty item which made the store look prettier, but it wasn't what the store primarily sold. Anyway, it wasn't a big deal, but I can see why 2 of the people I used to work with had quit, and the remaining one is desperately looking for a way out. It may just be a whim at the moment, but I don't think I'll come back to the same place next year. Sure the job is easy and I personally think I get paid okay, but maybe I should just try something else... I know it's such a small thing, but it's only a Christmas casual job so I think I can be a bit flimsy about it.

I guess today is another one of those bad days. It's not terribly bad, it's just...averagely bad.