Last month some time I told you about how my maths project was going nowhere and I was taking forever to get started. Then I posted again to tell you that our group presented and we were awesome. Now I am going to tell you how I got my marks back and I am feeling quite--- dissatisfied, angry, confounded, baffled and generally unhappy all at once.
So first off, I'll acknowledge that our presentation, despite being quite spectacular, was not the best thing in the world. OF COURSE it could have been better. But so could have your mother last night. Ah, I digress.
I walked out of my interview- which was averagely bad (though not bad enough for me to mind) and called my friends. They then informed me of our mark for our maths project. It was hideously low, for the effort we put in, and the result we achieved. Alright, scrap the effort bit, nobody gives a fuck how much effort you put in. BUT, the presentation itself was waaaay better. It sounds horribly suspicious since it was our group's presentation, but fuck you I'm telling the truth.
At that point I was bewildered- it was difficult to believe we had actually scored such a horrendously low mark. Grasping at any chance to appear at least a little rational, I asked "what's the reason? Why did we lose marks?" Then I was informed that we lost marks for various areas that I did not even THINK we'd lose marks in. When I pressed for a further explanation, my friends confessed that they did not know either. I asked for the scoring sheet--- there were several scorers for our presentation--- and was told that they were shredded.
No no, let me try that again. THEY WERE SHREDDED YESTERDAY MORNING, AND YESTERDAY WAS FEEDBACK DAY. It baffles me as to WHY anyone would shred goddamn marks on the morning of feedback day. My mind was filled with so much wtf I could hardly speak. WHAT. Just WHAT.
Aaaand to top it all off the person who shredded it all was my maths teacher. I was furious at what he did, but naturally I cannot bring myself to be mad at him, personally. I hardly believed he would/could do something like that. I was just so...confounded.
So now we've got a shit ass mark, there is no way to re-assess it because it was one presentation--- and we don't know why we lost marks, or WHO gave us hideous low marks for that matter, because THE MARKING SHEETS WERE SHREDDED. Great. Fucking fantastic. "But it doesn't matter!" or "It won't change your score that much!" --- neither of those are valid reasons or even acceptable facts of consolation. It does matter- for the simple truth that we were given less than we deserved and a higher score will positively affect my overall scoring.
Then on the phone I managed to overhear my friends talking to another teacher--- "No we won't change it" was what I heard--- and you can imagine my fury at that unsympathetic tone. I try very hard to not be who my parents are--- that is, if I was at fault, I will accept the responsibility. Except this is in no way any of our problem. Due to the absurd fact that our individual scores were shredded, we were denied any chance to rectify our marks. Oh, and I also overheard on the phone "It could've been better". That's why I was so vicious about it. "It could have been better" is a weak justification for any given mark, and will be valid for everything that is not 100%. Hearing that was adding insult to injury.
A small part of me is glad that I wasn't there, because I would have raged so hard at everyone and everything that it could not have ended well. Though I was hundreds of kilometers away from the actual incident at the time, I threw a tantrum in the car park I was at. I think whoever passed by would have heard me screaming insults into my phone. Not that I care.
So yeah... that's the most unexpected load of bullshit I've ever received. At this point in time my anger is rather contained--- it still exists, but it is mostly overwhelmed by disappointment. I reaaally didn't think we'd get screwed over for our maths project, of all things.
It's quite a shame, for my year to end on such a bitter note. I thought I liked maths.
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