Thursday, 10 November 2016

Trump Grabs America by the Pussy

The title makes it sound like a bad thing, but it's not like the US got raped or anything, I assure you. Which, if they did (btw), they asked for it. The people have voted (or in some cases, failed to vote), and in the end they got what they deserve. You can't really blame Trump for taking advantage of the situation; it was probably in his biological make up as a politician to grab any chance at presidency, and we just have to accept nature for what it is. If anything unfortunate befalls on Americans over the next four years, they should suffer and repent for their sins, for nothing but their moral depravity led them to where they stand.



Alright I should probably cut out the facetious jokes. It was done in poor taste. I'm sorry. Well, I'm only apologizing because it's not really a joke, because it's true, because Trump has won the US presidential election and life is going to be a bit sad if you're anything but an affluent cis white heterosexual male. The good news is, if you are all of those things, you should be just fine, and I wouldn't worry too much until global warming catches up with us all and we're all "pranked" by the Chinese hoax as our cities are drowned by rising sea levels. At least then there will be no worries over immigrants taking up all the local jobs, because major disasters take a lot of effort to recover from, and the rebuilding process should create a lot of jobs. Not to mention that major disasters also kill off a shit-tonne of people: maybe they die directly to injuries or they die secondarily to loss of shelter/food/medical services. So what I'm saying is, if you wipe out a good portion of the population there certainly wouldn't be much competition for whatever job you're so worried about losing. Like, your job might not exist any more due to the degree of societal disruption, but it's not like someone else will take it from you, so that's a win, yeah????


Hahah fuck, I should be more empathetic. Someone very dear to me lives in America, and she's terrified because she is in fact, not an affluent-cis-white-heterosexual-male. I mean, I don't meet all those criteria either, despite my desperate denial over the years and decent attempts to conceal the fact that I'm less straight than I'd like to be. Whoops. If I was an American I'd be pretty scared right now, too, but I'm just a SJW beta-cucklord so what the fuck do I know, right?

Okay, let's be serious. Just for a short while. In all honesty, a Trump presidency isn't the end of the world. We've known for a long time that he was likely to win, and though we lived in denial, Mr Trump is now president and we should respect that. The American population have spoken with their votes, and they have chosen Mr Trump, so he is now the face of America, and he represents what America wants. Though he said some less-than-appealing things (some of which I have flippantly made a meme of), this man has memed his way to presidency, and if nothing else, that is worthy of admiration. He didn't let his dank memes become just dreams, so I'm sure we can do the same. People get so angry at the outcome- they're angry at non-voters, they're angry at 3rd party voters, and they're angry at Trump supporters. I don't think there's a role for anger in this scenario, because the point of a democracy is to vote for what represents your best interests, correct? Certainly, when I go to vote, I don't really think about "hrmmm, which party would best benefit society as a whole", I care more about my personal issues, trite as they may be.

In terms of Trump... well, the majority of America believed that he would best represent their personal interests, and that's all there is to it. Things like "Hilary was too despicable" or "lesser of two evils" doesn't mean much- I mean, you could just vote for someone else, or not vote at all. Then people get mad at you for throwing your vote away, because you could have made a difference. Well, I don't think there's anything wrong with 3rd party voters- what's flawed is their strange voting system, but I won't go into that. Throwing your vote away is legitimate too- it just means you don't care. You don't care what happens to your country, you don't care what happens to your family, you don't care what happens to you or your friends. And that's fine, too. I say that because at one point in my life, I felt that way. I may have been more than a little apathetic and passively suicidal at the time, but that's when I could honestly say "I don't give a shit about politics". I was young and stupid and I literally didn't care.

Then came a point where it wasn't all about me. On a day-to-day basis, who runs this country does not much affect me, because I live a sheltered life, I'm studying at school, but I already have some form of education, I will find one job or another in the future. I don't need to worry about my family (who I do not like very much, but that's another story). But I see my friends, and they're suffering. They don't have someone to pay for their course- they got kicked out of home at 17, they're studying full time but working full time trying to pay the bills, the government won't give them any support and then they fail a course, drop out of uni, and they look to alcohol for comfort. Or the other guy who used to be in my class, who I regarded as a bit of an asshole- but in reality he's probably just socially awkward and struggling with crippling mental health problems. I couldn't be his friend and fix him (and I didn't want to be his friend), but if we had a better mental health framework in this country, maybe he wouldn't need to wait 6 months to see a psychiatrist who bills him hundreds, and because that psychiatrist is the only one in a 100km radius, there isn't even room for a second opinion. And so I cast a vote, for the people I care about. Because I'm selfish after all.

I hope I have made it clear to you that I am shocked, that America's most selfish desire happens to be Donald Trump, but I can understand why Hilary Clinton wasn't anyone's future-fantasy. I'm not sure what kind of world Trump will create; if his campaign is anything to go by, I have to say that I'm not very optimistic. Regardless, the people have spoken, and if Trump is what they want, then Trump is what they will get. For those crying that they did not vote Trump, and that they did not want him; today is one harsh lesson in the futility of individual struggle- it serves as a grim reminder that when you are stuck down in the mud, you will not be able to get up if people do not lift the sole of their shoe off your face. For too long, too many Americans have felt that they were the victims, they have felt that they were the ones with their face pressed against the mud in that dirty pit with the pigs, living their fruitless, undignified lives. And they've said, "no more". So they will get something else.

Mr Trump promises to make America great again. I'd like the slogan better if he didn't use the word "again", because at no point in time was America perfect, from its history of slavery to the current repression of women's rights. I'm not too sure which timeline Mr Trump would like to revert to, but Americans can pray (as they like to do, being the non-secular nation they are) that Trump loves his country, and makes the best decisions he can during his presidential term. The majority have made a choice I'm not sure I quite agree with, but whatever their rationale may be, we now face the consequence. Whatever that consequence may be, we live it out, for our love of our one and only life, and we struggle on in our personal quests for happiness, regardless of the political turmoil our world may be shaken by.


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