Sunday, 15 June 2014

I Don't Know

There's roughly one more day until test week begins. I feel terrible. It will be over soon, I know, but I feel kind of scared at the moment. There's a lot of stuff I've gone over and zero guarantee that I'll remember. My laptop isn't exactly cooperative either, it's kind of overheating and really slow at loading/opening files. I get so frustrated I kind of want to smash it on the ground.

I still haven't gotten to that point yet where I'm like "I don't care if I pass or fail". Like, of course I'll care if I pass or fail. I could not care for about the span of a day, and then when the results are about to be released my stress levels will take a hike. I get so nervous, even though the tests are meant to be "easy". It's not that easy.

I really don't think I have natural talent or any incline for the subject of medicine. It's like... interesting, sometimes, but everything takes so much effort for me to learn and remember. Back in high school there were so many subjects I could pick up with ease, and they would just all automatically make sense and manage to stay in my head. With med it's kind of like... if I stare at something for long enough I'll have a vague recollection of it, but I won't be able to conjure the information at a useful time (like during an exam).

Well, stress isn't going to do much for me, and at this point I don't think my revision means much any more. Hopefully the tests don't thwart my expectations, otherwise I'm going to have some very disappointing scores.

Wish me luck. x

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