What I think of professional gaming

Professional gaming is a new thing- it's pretty much like... people pay you for being good at playing games and they pay you to play. Sounds like a dream, right? I guess it's something I thought was cool when I was 12-16, but as I get older and older I start realizing what a terrible idea it all is and it's actually such a hard life to lead.

The event which prompted me to write this post is the retirement of my favourite LoL pro-player, Hai. I started playing League of Legends back in 2013, which is pretty much around the same time he went officially pro. I can't remember why the team Cloud9 became my fav team, but I've basically been a fan since their debut. I watched a lot of LoL matches because of them, and watching LoL sort of became the evening relaxation thing for me- you know, the same way people watch football with a beer in hand- I kinda do the same thing but I drink water/tea instead of beer.

I found Hai's personality remarkable- he was only slightly older than me, but here he was in a completely different world. His camera personality was highly likable, and he seemed way too mature for his age, and way too mature to be the kind of person who'd go down the pro-gaming path. Anyway I  cheered for him and his team and I was felt so sad watching the team decline since last year, leading up to Hai's retirement this year.

Pro-gamers do this thing that athletes do, where they practice for a stupid number of hours a day, just to play an hour or two of games per week. You don't need to be a doctor to know that playing games for 10+ hours a day is bad for your health. They say being sedentary is the new smoking, after all. I don't even know what damage it's doing to your eyes, but I spend a shit-tonne of time in front of the computer screen as well, and my vision's been declining over the years. Then all that time you're spending playing the game is time you're not spending socializing with the larger community, it's time you're not getting world experience. Now I just sound preachy, but that's such a dangerous life to live, when you dangle your career on a game. What happens when the game falls out of popularity? What happens if the company randomly goes bankrupt? What skills do you have to show then? "Yo I'm really good at League of Legends, so I think I'd make a perfect candidate for flipping burgers at McDonalds". You'd have to go back to university or start some sort of vocational training, if you want to compete on the job market- but then everyone is sort of ahead of you in terms of career, and you're just there, fucked over with life experience of a 16 year old but other people are laying down deposits of their first house.

Obviously some people make it out, they make it big time and get 2 million dollar contracts to play, and 2 million is something people would make over 20 years, and that's pretty sweet. But for every one of those big names that make it, there's probs 100+ people who's just doomed to fail and wasting their life. If you gamble with the probability, you realize the odds are actually shit. Sure that's how you "chase the dream" and "succeed", if gaming is your thing, but the risk-benefit analysis is not in your favor. Hai's only 20-something and he's "retired" from his gaming career. He's lucky that he's able to transition right into another job, managing the C9 organization. Even then he's going to have a hard time with his minimal management experience backed up with no degrees or qualifications- it won't be an easy job either way.

I guess being a pro-gamer gives you a unique experience like no other, and it would be really fun for a while, being able to play a game for days on end and that's the only thing you have to do, the only thing you focus on. For me, I imagine I'd just get really fucking bored, and start hating my job--- because it was just a game, and now it's more than a game- it's a job, it's income, it's a career. And holy shit the stress that comes with that realization would be unreal. In terms of the experience- look, poverty and war both give you memorable experiences, and they say if you can climb out of true poverty or if you survive the war, you'll come out with resilience like no other. Yet who in their right minds would want to live in an era of poverty and war? Sheesh.

Anyway the retirement of Hai made me really sad, so here I left a massive rant about why being a pro-gamer is shit for your life, with the 0 social stability etc. I guess I'll miss my favourite player- but maybe it's better that he's finding a different path in life. He seemed like he was struggling with mental health and beginning to develop an RSI, anyway. I'm just bitter that you can "retire" at 20 something. I really, REALLY hope he's ok in the end- I only know him as a personality, but I don't think I've come close to liking anyone else as much.

TL;DR: Drop your pro-gaming dreams, it's one of the shittest things you can do.